Have you ever had to defend your life?and why?

[akuser47]

I have only once had to against a step dad of mine that had just raped my step sisters ages 5 and 7 and when he broke through the door. to give some back ground this guy was meet to my mother through church he was all rightous in god so we thought he was a two timer from prison serious stuff through some serious affiliations in such things when this time came he was going to try and kill me and my mother and brother he came through the door after we had blocked it I had held a gun to him and I did not fire as I later learned I should have. hea escaped the police for a week and was found and send back to prison then released and came after me and my brother again with his goup of friends The law did little I did what I could in the end he was held at gun point by me as the sheriff showed up to arrest him for attempeted murder he has a life sentence now but I still woonder will he ever get out to come again with are %@*&$ poor legal system I should have taken his life. Yet I still hestiated in all the aftermath of this mans craze I still did not do it. I have still to wonder will this come back to haunt me. I think Our legal system is screwed up and it will be an issue in the future. So what are you thoughts on our right to defend ourselves and also take into account my last issue with this man was when I was 12 years old and when the first issue happended when I was 10 years old. what do you have to say on the matter.

[Trailboss]

akuser47,

Sorry to hear that this happened to you and your sisters. It shouldn't have and wasn't supposed to but there are people out there who do very bad things. It takes time and forgiveness to get over things like this. I've been a counselor for many years and have seen how difficult it can be to get past some things. I have been in situations in the past when I needed to defend someone I cared about. I did forgive the abuser, but I held him accountable for his actions and I defended others from him. Forgiving someone doesn't mean we allow them to continue to hurt others, and it doesn't mean we can't defend ourselves at the same time.

I once had to forgive a fella for hitting his wife. That was just before I broke his arm so he couldn't hit her anymore. I felt better after forgiving him and his wife felt better that her husband couldn't hit her anymore. The fella said he didn't feel so good though, but that's just what happens when we do things we shouldn't.

[Ranch Dog]

...I have still to wonder will this come back to haunt me.

It saddens me when I think about what children face and that a 12 year old has to make a decision whether a mad man lives or dies. At that age it is tough enough to decide what color of Kool-Aid to drink let alone make the decision that will or won't take a life.

You referenced your age at the time but not your present age or the time span that has lapsed. You also mentioned a "group" (gang?) affiliation the individual had, and I think if something were to happen it would have already have happened based on this affiliation. At least that is how it rolls in South Texas. If he has made no attempt to contact you while in prison, I think I would just monitor his sentence and parole dates. In my home State this can be done online. If his parole date is pending close, write the Parole Board and tell them how he has affected your life and your worries about his release. If he has tried to contact you, see an attorney to start the process of a restraining order and I would not respond to any correspondence.

I'm not a touchy, feelly kind of guy, but I would give some consideration to seeking a health care professional that you could talk to about this as the experience was at such a young age and perpetrated by a person that should have been responsible for your well being. That said and given your circumstance, I would train hard and be a master of arms based on the cards that your life has been dealt. I would seek a professional in this role as well.

[akuser47]

I am 33 now, It still ways heavy on my mind and for some reason was last night. thought I would mention it here in short story. This incedent made me relize that police will not save you it took them 3 hours to show up he had already broke in beaten my brother down disarmed me and beat me because I had not the guts to shot him and beat my mother who was trying to protect our stepsisters he then took them as they screamed and walked away. I will never trust the cops to be here for me they only can do what they can do and are very limited they write reports about it. I swore I would never hesitate again. I have always felt giult for not being able to shot him to stop him. I am just being honest with this not crying into my keyboard. Thanks for comments guys. Because of this I have a hardened my heart to be ready for the next situation if it ever occurs.
I thought I would share thanks for reading

[Ranch Dog]

I am 33 now, It still ways heavy on my mind and for some reason was last night.

Still, a heck of a burden for a young fellow to have to decide what to do and then carry through another 21 years. For a 12 year old, you made a good decision not to take a life. At that age, I don't think you have the basis to decide and I think the decision would weigh heavier had you done so. At 12, it isn't your burden to protect the family. It would be now and may be in that it is a burden now, you are basing this second guessing on what you should have done with an adult's knowledge. I don't believe a 12 year old should have it in him to decide to kill. The history of this country is full of stories of notorious individuals that had an early, justifiable start in killing another human and their life did not end well.

I really feel funny offering advice as I'm not versed in this other than being in several self defensive events in my life time. I've also intervened in a number of events that an individual was about to be killed or be beat to a point that their life was going to be dramatically be changed forever. I've reacted to these situation with the knowledge that I was going to take a life and everything was weighed out that it was the right thing to do to save a life. A split second to decide what is right and what is wrong and it is tough to do as an adult educated in the disciplines involved. It would have not been possible to make these decisions when I was 12.

[pricedo]

Every time the mother-in-law visits.
She makes "Tug Boat Annie" seem like "Mary Poppins".
She actually played baseball in an adult league until her arthritis became a problem & still has a mean right arm & I don't mess with her.
Everything I said about aggressive Grizzlies & Brown Bears applies to this extremely outspoken lady.

[Arktikos]

I never have been in that situation before and I don't think I could comprehend just what it would be like at any age let alone pre teen. It all comes down to split second life and death decisions and that frightens me as much as the bad guys out there. As for the justice system, yes it is flawed, partly because the lady holding the scales has a blindfold on. One can make the argument that the system is rigged against the victims and they are right. The only thing I have to say against that is by giving the prosecutors greater power to convict is akin to giving the government more power to abuse law biding citizens as well as the criminals. I guess the saying "be careful what you wish for" could apply. With all that said I would hope that a jury would see the difference between self defense and murder and not just what some lawyer cons them into.

Sent from my Milestone X2 using Tapatalk 2

[akuser47]

I am 33 now, It still ways heavy on my mind and for some reason was last night.

Still, a heck of a burden for a young fellow to have to decide what to do and then carry through another 21 years. For a 12 year old, you made a good decision not to take a life. At that age, I don't think you have the basis to decide and I think the decision would weigh heavier had you done so. At 12, it isn't your burden to protect the family. It would be now and may be in that it is a burden now, you are basing this second guessing on what you should have done with an adult's knowledge. I don't believe a 12 year old should have it in him to decide to kill. The history of this country is full of stories of notorious individuals that had an early, justifiable start in killing another human and their life did not end well.

I really feel funny offering advice as I'm not versed in this other than being in several self defensive events in my life time. I've also intervened in a number of events that an individual was about to be killed or be beat to a point that their life was going to be dramatically be changed forever. I've reacted to these situation with the knowledge that I was going to take a life and everything was weighed out that it was the right thing to do to save a life. A split second to decide what is right and what is wrong and it is tough to do as an adult educated in the disciplines involved. It would have not been possible to make these decisions when I was 12.

Well put I think that is a good assessment on how I am starting to see the past, and I need to be thankful for the outcome that I have rather than what may have been. While this criminal was my step dad he taught me in bad ways not to flinch and to take a punch when I had to, or to dodge and to lure in someone to counter attack to my advantage he was abusive but The fighting he taught me to endure has saved my butt as a bouncer over the years I do not work at clubs anymore to many broken bones but what I learned from this criminal he helped me handle alot of physical confrontations. Thanks RD you gave me a better perspective on this to look at.
Great board here when I can talk about somthing like this and get these kind of responses instead of trouble. Thanks to all that had an opinion.

[m1895g]

Yep, and for 13 months back in 1969.

[thegreatzues]

I am 33 now, It still ways heavy on my mind and for some reason was last night.

Still, a heck of a burden for a young fellow to have to decide what to do and then carry through another 21 years. For a 12 year old, you made a good decision not to take a life. At that age, I don't think you have the basis to decide and I think the decision would weigh heavier had you done so. At 12, it isn't your burden to protect the family. It would be now and may be in that it is a burden now, you are basing this second guessing on what you should have done with an adult's knowledge. I don't believe a 12 year old should have it in him to decide to kill. The history of this country is full of stories of notorious individuals that had an early, justifiable start in killing another human and their life did not end well.

I really feel funny offering advice as I'm not versed in this other than being in several self defensive events in my life time. I've also intervened in a number of events that an individual was about to be killed or be beat to a point that their life was going to be dramatically be changed forever. I've reacted to these situation with the knowledge that I was going to take a life and everything was weighed out that it was the right thing to do to save a life. A split second to decide what is right and what is wrong and it is tough to do as an adult educated in the disciplines involved. It would have not been possible to make these decisions when I was 12.

Well put I think that is a good assessment on how I am starting to see the past, and I need to be thankful for the outcome that I have rather than what may have been. While this criminal was my step dad he taught me in bad ways not to flinch and to take a punch when I had to, or to dodge and to lure in someone to counter attack to my advantage he was abusive but The fighting he taught me to endure has saved my butt as a bouncer over the years I do not work at clubs anymore to many broken bones but what I learned from this criminal he helped me handle alot of physical confrontations. Thanks RD you gave me a better perspective on this to look at.
Great board here when I can talk about somthing like this and get these kind of responses instead of trouble. Thanks to all that had an opinion.

im sorry to here that happend to you akuser47, honestly im not your age but i too had to deal with alot of violence when i was 9 to 12 my brother was in a gang and his "buddys" that were in prison and got out , and did horible things to people , they would come over and put guns to my head and click it , my brother would shoot threw the house with his pistol , and " get off" on shooting his rifle in his room in closet , my middle brother would beat me and throw me into the waterheater closet and puncher water sealent "the ones that you put on leather boots" and throw boxes of matchs and it would blow up and i would kick and scream and yell and they would laugh and they make me run in the back yard all four of them and shoot me with pelet guns and c02 pistols and "act like " it was a obsticle course. they would spit on me and hit me and tie me down and shoot my rist with pelet guns . but neverthe less wen i would tell my mom , they got worse and worse and there was nothing i could do ... but just like you said it hardens your heart and make you aware of how people can be so evil... im really sorry that happend to you and my prayers go out to you and hope you find peace